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FSM.

Accept His Noodly Magnificence into your heart, into your soul, and ye shall forever be free.

The Flying Spaghetti Monster is the deity of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, or Pastafarianism. A social movement that promotes a light-hearted view of religion and opposes the teaching of intelligent design and creationism in public schools. According to adherents, Pastafarianism is a “real, legitimate religion, as much as any other”.

In New Zealand, Pastafarian representatives are authorized to officiate weddings. However, in the United States, a federal court has ruled that the “Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster” is not a real religion. In August 2018 the Dutch Council of State also ruled that Pastafarianism is not a recognised religion. 80,000 people disagree.

May parmesan be upon his noodly tentacles.

The “Flying Spaghetti Monster” was first described in a satirical open letter written by Bobby Henderson in 2005 to protest the Kansas State Board of Education decision to permit teaching intelligent design as an alternative to evolution in public school science classes. In his letter, Henderson demanded equal time in science classrooms for “Flying Spaghetti Monsterism”, alongside intelligent design and factual evolution. After Henderson published the letter on his website, the Flying Spaghetti Monster rapidly became an worldwide phenomenon and a symbol of opposition to the teaching of creationism in public schools.

Pastafarians are real people like me and you.

He boiled for your sins.

“While ‘pastafarianism’ is the only religion based on empirical evidence, it should also be noted that this is a faith-based religion. Attentive readers will note numerous loop holes and contradictions throughout the ‘Al Dente’ texts; they will even find blatant lies and exaggerations. These have been deliberately placed there to test the reader’s faith.”

"Our pasta, who art in a colander, draining be your noodles. Thy noodle come, Thy sauce be yum, on top some grated Parmesan. Give us this day, our garlic bread, …and forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trample on our dreams. And lead us not into vegetarianism, but deliver us some pizza, for thine is the meatball, the noodle, and the sauce, forever and ever. R’amen."

  • EARLY MAN Fig. 1 - We know a great deal about the properties of gravity, yet we know nothing about the cause of the force itself. Therefore, I formally submit that the Flying Spaghetti Monster is behind this strange and often misunderstood force. This is because he doesn’t want us floating off earth into space.
  • MODERN MAN Fig. 2 - It is clearly evident that early man received much more touching (by pushing us down towards the Earth with His Noodly Appendages) than our modern-day counterparts. The average height of humans two thousand years ago was about five feet and three inches for males, compared with the average height of around five feet ten inches for males today.

He ended the prayer with: “Ramen.”

Fritz Creek area resident Mr Barrett Fletcher gives the invocation before a Kenai Peninsula Borough Assembly meeting as a representative of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster at Homer City Hall. A pastor wearing a spaghetti strainer on his head delivered the opening invocation at the Kenai Peninsula Borough Assembly meeting. The invocation by the pastor of the Homer congregation of the Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster is the second non-traditional invocation before the assembly since a court ruling.

Barrett Fletcher | Alaska

Around the time of Christmas, Hanukkah and Kwanzaa, Pastafarians celebrate a vaguely defined holiday named ‘Holiday’. Holiday does not take place on a specific date so much as it is the Holiday season itself. Because we reject dogma there are no specific requirements for Holiday. Pastafarians celebrate Holiday however they please. We also celebrate Pastover and Ramendan.

Disclaimer About Midgets

FSM does not wish to discriminate or cause hurt feelings among any group—and this is especially true of the very short, who, if provoked, could easily appear out of nowhere and attack. As a solution, we offer the following: To prevent angering the little people community, we suggest that this book be placed on the very highest shelf possible.

Buy the Gospel of FSM

Buy the Gospel of FSM

This is an un-edited duplicate of the fascinating writings on FSM beliefs and holy gospel by Bobby Henderson. The book is an open letter to the Kansas State Board of Education. We make zero profit from this publication, the cost is simply for print and delivery.

Get your copy here.

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